Light up defiantly in storms

Walking chimneys, take note! If you’re one who absolutely must have a cancer stick no matter the situation, then I would highly recommend the Delta Stormproof Lighter. Forget about Zippos – those’re old school, these babies are able to ignite a flame despite being in the presence of 70-80 mph winds (what are you doing out there in the first place is another question), capable of hitting 2000°F on the thermometer while remaining water tight when closed. It is encased with a tough elastomer armor for outstanding impact resistance, so you can hurl it a thief who’s running away to knock him out without having it suffer any damage. $49.95 is all it needs to expedite your path to the grave, but you can also bring this on camping trips if my nicotine-laden brain serves me right. One thing though – if you’re so adamant on lighting up in such fierce winds, chances are a wayward flying branch or projectile will do you in before those cigarettes do.

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